AKBAR BIRBAL KE MASHOOR KISSE
A One day Akbar Badshah commanded Birbar [=Birbal], "Bring me a Muslim turned into a Hindu." Birbal asked for the respite of one week. The king agreed. When six days had passed, on the seventh day Birbar took a donkey to the river and busied himself in bathing it. It happened that Akbar Badshah too came to the river. He asked, "Oh Birbar, what are you doing?" He submitted, "Refuge of the World, I am bathing this donkey, so that it will turn into a horse." The king said, "You fool, can a donkey possibly turn into a horse?" Birbar submitted, "Refuge of the World, how can a Muslim turn into a Hindu?"
B One day Akbar Badshah, in the assembly, asked all of them, "Which flower is the best flower of all?" No one could answer. Finally Birbar's turn came. Birbar said, "That flower is the best of all flowers, from which the whole world's clothing is made."
C One day Akbar Badshah drew a line with his auspicious hand on the floor of the open court, and commanded, "Make this small, but don't by any means erase it with your hand." All those present were stupefied. When Raja Birbar's turn came, he at once drew another line next to it, and didn't disturb the first line. Those present saw it, and said, "In truth, the first line is small(er)."
D One day Akbar Badshah was riding along on his open palanquin. Raja Birbar rode along in attendance at his side. And Birbar's mother's name was well known to be Kali [=black], and Akbar Badshah's esteemed mother's name was Ni`mat [=blessing]. It happened that on the road a black bitch was coupling with a dog. The king's gaze fell on her. He said to Birbar, "Look what that black bitch [or, that bitch Kali] is doing." Birbar submitted, "Refuge of the World, according to you she is Kali/black, but to that dog she is indeed a Ni`mat/blessing!"
E One day Akbar Badshah commanded Raja Birbar, "If you become a Muslim, you'll get a great reward." Birbar submitted, "I'll give an answer tomorrow." He took his leave from there, and went out, and calling all the scavengers [haramkhor] he said, "The king has given the order, 'I will make all the scavengers Muslim.' Be on your guard!" So at once the scavengers went all together before the king and submitted, "We don't accept the Muslim religion!" Birbar submitted, "Refuge of the World, when these people don't accept it, how will anyone else accept it?"
F One day Akbar Badshah said to Birbar, "Bring me four individuals--one, a hero; two, a coward; three, a modest person; four, a shameless person." The next day Birbar brought a woman and had her stand before the king. Hazrat commanded, "I had called for four individuals, and you brought one. Where are the others?" Birbar submitted, "Refuge of the World, this one has all four qualities." The king directed him, "Explain." He replied, "When she stays in her in-laws' house, out of shame she doesn't even open her mouth to speak clearly. And when she sings insult-songs at a marriage somewhere, her father and brothers and husband and in-laws and caste-fellows all sit and listen, but she's not ashamed before any of them. And when she sits with her husband, at night she won't even go alone into the store-room, and she says, 'I'm afraid to go.' Then, when she takes a fancy to someone, at midnight in the dark, all alone, with no weapon, she goes fearlessly to meet her lover, and is not at all afraid of robbers or evil spirits." Hearing this, the king was pleased, and gave Birbar a reward, and commanded, "You speak truly."
G One day Akbar Badshah had gone to the riverbank for an excursion along the river. Birbar too was there with him. In order to test Birbar, the king took a priceless pearl necklace off from his neck and dropped it in the river and said to Birbar, "Birbar, mala de ['Give the necklace'; or ma la de, 'Bring and give [your] mother']." Without hesitation Birbar said, "Refuge of the World, bahne do ['Let it float away'; or bahnen do, `Give [your] sisters']." The king smiled, and was inwardly very pleased.